Selina's grandmother passed away early this morning. She and her family are heading down to The Valley today to help coordinate and attend services. As if losing her grandmother wasn't enough, she has to go down there without me since I have to stay in Pflugerville to take care of some things for the house that we have scheduled for today, tomorrow and Monday.

As I mentioned in my previous posting, Lunch In A Lowe's Bag, we stopped by Lowe's on Sunday to purchase a runner for the stairs. When the person came to help cut the length I wanted (12 feet), I asked her if she needed any help because she was obviously struggling with trying to unroll and measure it. She refused. She continued to struggle, so I asked again. She refused again. She ended up telling us that she was going to give us a little more than 12 feet. I was like, wow, that's nice of her.

Wrong.

I get home today and happily start cutting my stair rugs. After cutting 3 rugs, I noticed that it didn't seem like I was going to have enough runner to cut 13 rugs. I measured the remaining runner roll and came up with just over 5 feet. Hmmm. If each rug is roughly 9.5 inches and I had only cut 3 so far, then it means that she only gave me about 8 feet of runner, yet I was charged for 12 feet. WTF! That meant that we had to make the trip back to Lowe's to purchase more. The guy who helped us today was the department manager and he was genuinely helpful, so it took the edge off my anger. I still shake my fist at the other employee, though.

And if that wasn't bad enough, our dishwasher didn't arrive today, AT&T didn't connect our phone line today and the goddamn Brinks people are calling me like I owe them money (which I don't). Sigh. If it's not one thing it's another...

Today's post is the first since we signed the paperwork and got the keys to our new house. Wow, I still can't believe we have a house! Here's a quick rundown of the days

Wednesday and Thursday were spent dealing with the closing process and packing like crazy people. By 5:15PM on Wednesday we had the keys to the house. By 5:30 Ratchet had claimed the yard as his own by peeing on everything imaginable. Haha.

Friday was the big move -- hello17' U-Haul truck! I'm glad that I don't have to drive one of those things everyday. We started packing the truck at about 9:30 and finished unloading it at the house around 2:30. After dropping the U-Haul back off on North Lamar when we were done with it, we came back to the house and started hanging blinds. We also evicted some birds from two of the exhaust vents. I felt bad for the birds, but they aren't paying the mortgage, now are they? We made one last stop at Sears to purchase a new dishwasher (ours is dead), a lawnmower and weeder/edger. When the day was done, Selina and I practically collapsed into the bed. Long. Ass. Day.

Saturday morning I woke up (sore and all) and mowed the lawn while Selina got ready to get her engagement ring appraised for insurance purposes. Selina's parents stopped by again to finish hanging the remaining blinds. Oh, and we went to Home Depot for a handful of things we needed. Later that evening we met up with Linda for her birthday dinner at Kenobi. Selina had her first sushi experience. I started her off with something safe -- a Philadelphia roll. I ordered a Seven & A Half for myself (yellowfin tuna, salmon, yellowtail, masago, avocado, rolled tempura style with eel sauce, spicy pepper paste and Japanese mayo). Selina not only enjoyed her Philadelphia, but she liked my Seven & A Half as well! Awesome. Since we were still so damn tired from all the moving, we decided to skip the trek downtown.

Sunday was more laid back. We slept a little later, but we still had some things to take care of. We stopped by the AT&T store to get set up for DSL and a home phone. I never thought I'd sign up for a home phone again, but unfortunately we need one if we want the security system activated (there's another story concerning the security system that I'll have to save for another date). I never thought I'd go with DSL, either, but apparently Time Warner only services the people in the subdivision across Grand Avenue Parkway from us. Bunch of jerks. Anyway, the computers at the AT&T store were flaking out, so we left because we needed to go to the apartment pick up some of the smaller things we left.

After packing the car once again and dealing with a small water leak, we headed to Lowe's to buy a replacement plug for the dryer and to try and find a runner for our stairwell (we have laminate wood floors in all but the kitchen and two smaller bedrooms). Oy, it seems like we've practically lived in the home improvement stores (Lowe's, Home Depot and Sears) this weekend. We've been there so many times that I actually took my lunch to work with me in a Lowe's bag. Anyway, we found the runner we wanted and are going to try something a little non-traditional...I'll post a picture soon.

So that's about how our weekend went -- if we weren't packing, we were moving. If we weren't moving, we were at a home improvement store. You get the idea.

I'm sure all of you who already own a house are thinking, "Newbie, I'd like to see how you feel about being a homeowner once the novelty wears off and the maintenance kicks in". Well, screw you people -- I'm so excited I could almost wet my pants.

I think I spent more time on my cell phone today than I did all of the rest of the month. I talked to my credit union to find out if they had a coin machine (15 lbs. of change turned into $112.20...sweet). I talked to our loan officer. I talked to the title company to confirm our home warranty. I talked to Reliant Energy and set up our electric service. I talked to Atlas Energy and set up our natural gas service. I got a call from Linda who had some much needed boxes (thank you, thank you). Then I talked to the City of Pflugerville and found out that I needed to drive there in person to establish water and trash services. Dang, wish I had known that BEFORE I drove to Parmer and back when I cashed in the coins. Anyway, to Pflugerville I drove.

While I was filling out the paperwork, the person at the Pflugerville Utilities desk asked if I was a current resident of Pflugerville, to which I responded no. After I wrote her the check for the deposit and she confirmed the address and other info, she handed me a "Welcome to Pflugerville" bag. Wasn't that nice? Now I have a fancy "Pf" sticker, a tape measure with the city logo on the side and a whole bunch of informational brochures to look through.



Then it hit me...as of Wednesday, I will no longer be a citizen of Austin. Even though I'm only 20 minutes from downtown Austin, when people ask me where I live, I will have to fight the urge to say "Austin, Texas". That would be like the people who say "Houston, Texas" but actually mean "Sugar Land, Texas" or "League City, Texas". Don't lie -- you know at least two people who say things like that. Long have I mocked those people and I refuse to join their ranks. "Pflugerville, Texas" it shall be.

With only 4 days left until closing, I'm estimating that we are maybe halfway done with packing. The only place we have yet to set a box in would be the kitchen. Ugh...the kitchen. I'm so not looking forward to that.

I think we are definitely shooting for next Saturday as moving day. I took vacation this whole week, which should help us meet that goal. I guess the only thing that bothers me is that we are going to be paying for practically a whole month of rent (we can give our 30 day notice once we close on the house) and we're not even going to be here for most of it. Oh well -- such is life.

After negotiating with the seller about the requested repairs, she decided just to go ahead and give us additional money at closing in lieu of actually having the items repaired. Works out fine for us because it means that we get to choose how the money will be spent (i.e. we are getting a new dishwasher). I also think she was worried that she wouldn't be able to make the repairs in time for the closing date and she seems quite ready to get out from under the current mortgage.

Speaking of the closing date, it's been moved up to July 23rd. Holy Jesus, that's next week! I was kinda taken by surprise yesterday when the loan officer called and told us that the seller preferred that date, so I had to make a quick transfer of funds from my ING account to my Bank of America account. In case you don't know how ING works, a "quick transfer" takes 2-3 business days, so I'm cutting it a bit close. Truth be known, I should have made the transfer earlier in the week.

So basically we are waiting for the underwriters to finish up paperwork -- and for the insurance agent that Selina's parents want us to use to call me back. Dude, I've been trying to talk to this guy for the past three days. If he doesn't want my business, then I'm going to find someone else who does. With the closing date being 5 days away, we really don't have time to sit around waiting. Arg!

Aside from some minor repairs that need to be addressed, the house got the go-ahead from the inspector today. There are some boards that need to be replaced on the outside of the house, the windows need to have the screens put back on (per FHA requirements), some butt-joints need to be caulked and sealed (boy that sounds funny), and we need to discuss the non-working dishwasher with the seller. Oh, and I have to evict a family of birds from the dryer exhaust vent. Other than that, everything checks out. Woohoo!

After the inspection was over, we headed to Luby's for a late lunch (it was probably 2:15 when we sat down). This was actually Selina's first time eating at Luby's -- and she's already said that it will not be her last. Any place that makes good macaroni and cheese is going to make Selina a happy girl. We stuffed our faces and then decided to stop by Lowes to price appliances and look at cabinet hardware (you know, knobs and stuff).

We saw a washer and dryer set that we really liked along with a range and a dishwasher. While the only thing we'd probably be getting in the near future would be the dishwasher (pending the talk with the seller), we still like the idea of eventually being able to pick the ones we really want. We can dream, can't we?

Anyway, since our estimated closing date (July 28th) is coming up pretty fast, we've started the arduous task of packing up the apartment. Hot dog, I loves me some packing! Not. Right now I'm working on the bookshelves and the hall closet while Selina tackles the closet by the front door. 5 boxes filled, numerous others to go...

So my aunt, being a relative newbie to the world of electronic mail, falls for all the garbage that's floating around the internet that happens to end up in her Yahoo inbox. You know, things like "send this to 10 people or the baby seal gets it", "add your name to this email and send it on so that Bill Gates can send you a check for $10,000", "boycott Exxon-Mobil for lower gas prices" and "forward this message within the next 2 minutes and Jesus will knock on your front door". Yeah, I guess she really believes them. While I read them just to get a few laughs at how guillible people are, the chain stops with me. Here's an example of one she sent me today (after I cleaned up all the unecessary carriage returns, random capitalizations and the glaring spelling/grammatical errors):

An old lady walked into a grocery store. She wanted to buy the best dog food in the world for her little puppy. She went up to the cash register to buy the food. The sales lady told her that the store did not allow old ladies to buy animal food unless they show the actual animal because a lot of old ladies like to eat the animal food themselves. So, the old lady went home, got her dog and went back to the store to buy her dog food. The next day she came back to buy the best cat food around. But the sales lady told her the same thing, so the old lady went back home and brought her cat to the grocery store to buy the cat food. The next day the old lady went to the grocery store again carrying a big container. She went up to the the sales lady and said, "Put your hand inside here." The sales lady shook her head. "No," she said. "There is probably something in there that will bite me!" "I promise you there is nothing in here that will bite you," the old lady said. So the sales lady stuck her hand inside the container and screamed.

To find out what was inside the container you must send it to at least 8 people.

When the computer says your mail has been sent, hit ALT-8 and the container will pop up on your screen. Do this! Its hysterical!! It works!! I HAD TO SEND THIS ONE! YOU'LL SEE WHY AT THE END.

So I guess we're supposed to believe that this email is blessed with magical powers, huh? In any case, you can press Alt-8 until your keyboard goes out and the only thing that will happen is that you'll have a cramp in your hand. Dear God, I sure hope I wasn't that retarded when I first got online.

Anyway, being the curious person that I am, I decided to try and find out what was in the container. In doing so, I happened to come across the actual joke that the chain letter was based on (good old Google).

<An old lady went to the store to buy some food for her dog. Upon reaching the check-out, the clerk told her "I'm sorry ma'am, but the store manager heard that many old ladies on limited incomes buy dog food and eat it themselves. We now have a policy - if you want to buy dog food, you have to show us your dog." Annoyed, the lady went home, got her faithful Fido, and returned to the store, where they sold her the dog food without question. The next day, she returned to the store to buy cat food. Again, she's reproached by the cashier: "I'm sorry ma'am, but the store manager heard that many old ladies on limited incomes buy cat food and eat it themselves. We now have a policy - if you want to buy cat food, you have to show us your cat." Frustrated, the woman stormed home, retrieved her precious Fluffy and returned to the store, where she was sold her cat food without further incident. The next day, the woman returned to the store and strode right up to the cashier with a box in her hand. "Put your hand in this box," she told the puzzled clerk. "What's in it?" the clerk asked. "Just put your hand in here," the lady said. "No, there's probably something in there that will bite me," said the clerk. "Nothing will bite you, I promise." Reluctantly, the clerk put her hand in the box, felt the contents, pulled them out to examine them and let out a scream. Smiling, the old lady asked "Now, may I please buy some toilet paper?"

Needless to say, it's not much better than the chain letter. As far as I'm concerned, it was a waste of 5 minutes.

Let's begin with Wednesday afternoon. So Selina and I went with Anna (our new realtor) to see several houses up in Pflugerville. We saw several that we liked, but there was one that absolutely knocked the others out of the park. Oh, I could tell by Selina's eyes that this was the house we were going to pursue. It was a nice 2,041 square foot 2-story house in the Springbrook Glen subdivision in Pflugerville. Coincidentally, it's only a street down Grand Avenue Parkway from Liliana, although technically she's in a different subdivision.

Now on to Thursday. After talking it over most of Wednesday night, we decided to go ahead and put in an offer that afternoon just before we left to Garner State Park to meet up with Selina's parents for the July 4th weekend. Our offer was $6,900 less than the current asking price, but since it had been on the market for over 40 days and the asking price was above our "maximum", we decided that we had nothing to lose. After stopping by Anna's house to fill out paperwork and write some checks, we headed off for Ratchet's first camping excursion and a date with the Frio River.



Oh, the Frio was as cold as I remembered it. I'm a big baby and gradually ease myself in there, making ugly faces the whole way. Ratchet was a little more brave and kinda just dove in. We really didn't know how well Ratchet could swim, but it turns out that he's pretty good at it. I think Selina described it best when she said he looked like a little otter out there. I think he enjoyed it up until a certain point, then he got cold and wanted out. We tried sitting him up in a tube that had a partial bottom, but he just stood there, shaking like a chihuahua in the winter. Silly dog.

Friday we got a call back from Anna saying that the seller countered with a higher offer -- she wanted $2,000 more than our original offer, which would bring it to $4,900 less than the current list price. She also hinted that she wanted to close sooner than we had asked (our original paperwork had it down as August 20th). We were told to think it over and call back the next day. So we spent some time at the river, some time just lounging around the campsite, some time down at the pavilion dancing and eventually some time drinking beer around the campfire with Selina's parents.

Saturday morning Selina and I decided to counter back with $1,000 less than her counter offer -- plus we wanted her to pay $300 towards our closing costs since we'd have to "move out of our apartment early". In exchange we would schedule the closing date to whenever the paperwork went through the bank. I said bye to Anna and we basically sat around wondering about the house the rest of the weekend as nothing could be done until the seller could contact the credit union to discuss a closing date. We spent more time at the river, I found out that the book that I brought along to read was misprinted (the page numbers went up to 86, skipped back to 55, went back up to 86, then skipped to 119 -- there were a whole 33 pages missing!), spent more time lounging around and drove to Leakey to stock up on more beer. We're talking about avoiding a potential crisis here...thank God for drive-thru beverage barns!

Sunday morning we ate breakfast and packed up for the drive back home. It started sprinkling as we were packing, then it started pouring as we were leaving the park. Selina's parents weren't leaving until Monday, so they took shelter as the storms passed. We found out that the day wasn't a complete washout for them as the sun popped out and it turned out to be a pretty nice day after all. The whole day the only thing we could think about was the house...oh, the torture!

Now comes Monday; the day of truth. Selina called me about mid-morning to tell me that Anna just called her and said that the seller accepted our counter-counter offer. Sweet Jesus, I was so happy that I could have slapped somebody! Heck, I could have slapped Jesus himself. So now we're doing more paperwork and lining up an inspector for Thursday. Our preferred inspector (whom Jon recommended) was going to be out of town all week, so we ended having to go with a backup in order to meet the new closing date we agreed on (July 28th). Oh well, I guess you can't win them all.

I'm just happy that this thing seems to be rolling along and that, pending the inspection, we'll be looking at owning our first home before August. There are only two words to describe how I'm feeling right now: fucking awesome.

I know it's not good manners to laugh about people getting food poisoning, but I find it a little amusing that a store associated with an e.coli-tainted beef recall is called Ralphs. What's next? Earl's Vegetables closed down due to salmonella outbreak?